Is it time to give up?

My husband and I have been married for just over a year and it has been nothing but constant fights since we said I DO! Everyone blames it on separation from the army, deployment and having to live in 2 different states because of custody issues. He's been in NC since coming home from deployment and I have been in the north east. Every conversation we have just turns into another fight, he never asks about the kids, 2 boys, and just complains about his day. It's never i love you honey, how was your day, nothing...



We have also run into where he has started to become very controlling. I can't even walk away from him in public without him freaking out telling me I need to ask permission before walking away. I can't get a job because I have to be home with our children but I can't purchase anything because it's his money and he worked for it. What gives??



Am i over reacting or is it time to just call it quits?? I'm going crazy. :-(Is it time to give up?
Maybe u guys should get councling and thats not fair if hes telling u u cant spend any money. He needs help
Yes... If he is acting this way I would walk away.. Try counseling first.Is it time to give up?
I would try to talk with him about how you are feeling, and if things still don't change, I would call it quits
Sounds like it's time for counselling. He may have PTSD. I would give it a fighting chance. At least find out for sure whether the marriage can be saved or not. Your boys need and deserve a stabile home life, as well as you. This may be the wake up call you all need to get started on recovery.Is it time to give up?
U should not give up. Do u think by giving up, u will have a happier/ more complete life? No, each will not, because as long as u don’t understand the concept of True Love fully, your future relationship will never work out. It’s up to both of u, to make your marriage the most beautiful/ passionate in the world or not.



You have fights? Why? Because u both have different visions of True Love. Mostly, u both practice Self-Love now. If that is the case, then the blame is more on your husband, because he is supposed to be the True Leader in your family. But u need to do your part too.



First thing u need to do: u need to find a way to be together. U have to move where he works, or he has to move to where u live. Each tries his/ your best.



Second, ask him:"Husband, do u agree that we are losing passion for each other? Do u agree that we both have to try our best to resolve our differences, to make our marriage work? Do u believe if things get worse between us, we need to meet a marriage counselor? Do u believe that both of us should have the same True Purpose in life when we married each other? That True Purpose is this: we live for the betterment/ happiness of our children, because our fights/ disagreements/ divorce, or the manner in which we have a happy union/ marriage will affect our future children, ie: their happiness, personality disorders, confused knowledge about relationships/ marriages? Do u believe in the same True Love concept, that to please/ love the other person is more important than to be pleased/ loved?



Third, how to get the right marriage adviser (therapist, counselor, psychologist, psychiatrist)? Many advisers cannot help people, they just want your money, because those counselors themselves do not understand the concept of True Love the fullest, a perfect concept/ way of life that covers all aspects of life, all the ultimate concepts of:"How to be Romantic, True Happiness, True Marriage, True Relationship, True Parenting, True Friendship, True Purpose of Life, True Leadership, True Faith in God, Kingdom of Heaven”. For example, many educated people claim that they are experts in sex. But in reality, there is no greater sex expert in this world than God, because He created that concept of sex. The conclusion? The best marriage counselor is the one who understands the whole concept of True Love, the highest. The one with a faith background, like a priest, the one who understands a divine concept like True Love, because True Love was created by a Divine person: God.



Four, to be a True Leader, the role given by God, he needs to be more unselfish/ mature/ compassionate/ wiser than his wife (he needs to ask about the kids, he cannot complain about his day). This is all in the bible. Life is like a dance. One has to lead. To be a good leader in dancing, or to make a dance to be a beautiful, artistic, enjoyable, concerted, passionate movement that make both partners crave for more, men, u have to know your steps (as the leader) and hers (as the follower), for u to lead both a certain direction, while she needs to know only her steps. Think logically. Is it better for the wife to be the leader, instead of the husband? Should the wife lead the husband in bed, in life, in marriage, or should he?



Not knowing the concept of True Love the fullest (the loosing passion, the fights between u two, being selfish) is actually a universal problem. Most people in the world believe that they understand the meaning/ concept of True Love, but in reality, they don’t. The proof? The divorce rate in America is more than 50 %. That high divorce rate proves: they practice the other concept more: Self-Love.



It is the media’s fault. The media (movies, books, radios, TV, magazines, newspapers) has confused people with the wrong meanings of True Love, for 200 years. ”I think I have found my True Love”, or “I fell in love with her at first sight”. Even Jane Burns understands, in the movie ‘Dan in Real Life’:”Dad, love is not a feeling, it’s an ability”. True Love is not a thing/ person; it’s a divine concept of living. Only from living it (an ability), can we truly enjoy the power of it (a divine feeling).



In the beginning, God created a perfect concept namely True Love, as a manual for humans to live a truly happy life, for the use in finding and enjoying their divine state: as happy, as complete, and as powerful as God. Yet humans are lured into believing that another concept, called Self-Love, or Selfishness, would bring a higher happiness/ more powerful state. In reality, the Devil (Fallen Angels) invented that Self-Love notion, to steal us from the very joy of life, whereas the end result is, we are tricked. Less power, weaker foundation for us. Sadness, confusions, stresses, personality disorders in children, problems, loneliness, hate, jealousy, fights, violence, divorces, wars, etc. The derivatives of selfishness.